A few months after my first husband died, I remember strolling through a local shopping mall, pushing my son, Jared, in a baby carriage.
“Sue!” A young, pretty blonde called to me from across the crowded plaza.
“Carrie? Is that you?” I hadn’t seen Carrie since we attended the same Christian high school, at least seven years ago.
“I heard what happened with Gerry. I’m sorry.”
I nodded my head. Boy, word sure does travel through the network of churches!
“Thanks,” I replied, trying to smile. As often as I listened to people talk about Gerry’s death, it always felt like a stab in the heart.
“How are you doing?” Carrie looked at me intently. (That’s usually the second question that follows “I’ve heard”. I don’t blame people. I’ve found myself fumbling for words when I’ve talked with others who’ve experienced loss. What does a person say?)
“God’s good.” It’s the first thing that popped into my head and out of my mouth. I couldn’t help it. It was the first thing that popped into my head every time people asked me the question, “How are you doing?”
Carrie cocked her head and smiled. I suppose she was a little unsure of what to say.
I continued, trying to explain. “We miss Gerry so much but God’s been taking good care of Jared and me. Jesus is our help and strength.”
And there it was plain and simple. In the midst of unspeakable pain, God is still good. Why? Because it is His nature: Goodness. Even when life doesn’t “feel good”, God’s nature, His character does not change.
It goes to reason that since, (not if), God is good, then whatever He does or whatever He allows to happen is “good”.
Whatever happens, (there’s a lot of sin and corruption in this world), even though people might mean it for evil, God will turn it to good, if we are open to His leading and help.
Are you wondering about God’s goodness in the midst of your pain? Search the Scriptures and see the goodness of the Lord. The prophet Nahum says in chapter one, verse seven: “The Lord is good, A stronghold in the day of trouble; And He knows those who trust in Him.”
Yes, God is good in the good times, the bad times, and every time in-between. Trust Him with your life. It’s the only way to really live!
I am praying for you.
In Jesus’ love,
Susan
“Oh give thanks to the Lord, for He is good! For His mercy endures forever.” Psalm 136:1
5 comments:
Yes, God IS Good! I love Romans 8:28 and so thankful that God put it in the Bible!!! Have you come up with a thoughtful response to someone that is hurting from loss? If the "how are you doing" question is awkward...what would be a more sensitive approach to let someone know that you care? Just wondering....
Hello, Susan.
You and I are just getting to know one another, but I happened to notice that you have this blog. I just wanted to pass along a prayer request to you. I ask you to pray for a young lady named Priscilla. I don't know her very well, except to hear others tell about this. Anyway, she is twenty-one years old and was married to Dan in May of 2006. Tuesday of this week Dan went to be with the Lord after a relatively short battle with tongue cancer. He was 31. After reading your profile, I felt that you could identify with this young widow. There is a memorial service today, which my daughter and her husband have gone to. It's taking place as I type.
So, please be praying for these families--they are all believers, and thank God, Dan was truly saved and my understanding is that they as a couple brought much glory to God during this past year. Thanks for listening.
:o)
Hello Susan,
"God is good" a very true reply. It's also a very kind reply because it puts the one attempting to 'console' at ease.
As one who has experienced loss (by death) of every conceivable relationship, (with the exception of my children, though I have lost two grandchildren), I have experienced all kinds of comments ranging from the well intended to the sheer tactless.
On the whole, I have observed that it is the bereaved who ends up doing 'the consoling' trying to put the onlooker at ease.
For me, the most empathic words someone could say are something like: "I'm so sorry, it must be very hard for you just now."
It had always been my intention to write mostly about loss and bereavement on my blog. So far I've barely touched on it. You have inspired me to follow this through in the near future. Thank you for that , Susan.
just noticed a couple of your comments on some later posts so i'm just popping in to say thank you for your words of kindness and encouragement. Your very much appreciated :o]
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